PFLAG is Overflowing with Good Queer News!
The PFLAG national conference was overflowing with love and hope, plus a roundup of some amazing stories!
Good morning, lovely people! I am writing this edition on the plane headed away from the PFLAG National Convention, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to fully express just how much this gathering refills my hopeful batteries. Because of a family commitment, I spent just over 24 hours at the conference, and it was miraculous. I have plenty of actual news news to share in the second half of this article, but I can’t talk about hope and joy without talking about PFLAG a little first.
Also: If you’ll be at the Out and Equal conference this week in Seattle, so will I! Come be my friend!!
To kick us off, Illinois governor JB Pritzker welcomed us in with the opening keynote, and it was unbelievably refreshing to hear an elected official coming down so firmly in support of trans rights. He did not hedge, did not pull punches, did not share platitudes. He spoke honestly and angrily about authoritarianism, about the strength we build in community with one another, and about the tactical steps Illinois is taking to protect its LGBTQ+ (and specifically transgender) residents.
“As an American who actually believes in freedom, if they want to come for trans kids, they’re going to have to come through me.” - JB Pritzker at the PFLAG National Conference
On Saturday, I spent the day in workshops about Black Queer Families, storytelling, advocacy, and the session I delivered which focused on the role of joy in building an impactful, lasting movement.
My room was completely full, with a few more folks standing in the back, and the love I received at the end of the session brought more than a couple tears to my eyes. More than anything, this conference left me feeling so completely and utterly wrapped in love. Everywhere I went were folks hugging each other (and me!) talking about what they dreamed of for their chapters, what advocacy strategies they were trying out. Old friends reconvened, new friendships were formed, and all in, over 500 people came together to talk about living the PFLAG motto: Leading with Love.
Some of you have heard me speak in the past about how much I love PFLAG. In 2022, I started on a mission to speak, for free, to every single PFLAG chapter in the country. I am at about 150 presentations so far. These presentations, which happen periodically over many years, give me such a beautiful way to stay tuned with the small victories, the successful strategies, and the trends in allyship that I get to bring to you here.
I also got to sneak in a quick 12-hour road trip to and from La Crosse, Wisconsin to sell books at their banned book fair as a featured guest. I went with a friend (who, by the end of the trip, I’m glad to call a much closer friend) and we were both pleasantly shocked by the size, enthusiasm, and support of the event. It was PACKED! The books were totally radical, and I sold out of all the books I brought. The librarians and bookstore staff seemed to be constantly running to the bookstore to grab more piles of books to stock, too. We met in a really cool coffeeshop with the door flung open, and I saw quite a few passersby stop and stare and eventually decide to venture in. I talked to some folks with supportive families from tiny towns, and to a grandma starting a new little free library.
Sometimes I have to put in a little extra leg work to look for reasons to be hopeful. Other times, though? It’s easy. When I’m surrounded by my community, when I’m getting to teach about joy and trans rights, when I’m seeking out new partners to work with and deepening my bonds with my friends and strategizing for intentional and bold advocacy campaigns, the joy writes itself.
AND… the joy that I have to share with you this week isn’t just me having a lot of fun. There are some fantastic news stories, legal victories, as well as cultural “vibe shifts” that I think are super important to highlight. Change isn’t always going to be visible or tangible or measurable. Sometimes it is, sure, but other times it may be harder to pinpoint what our work is meaning, who it’s reaching. I can tell you—it’s reaching people. Keep calling your elected officials. Keep getting involved in local campaigns (especially with just under a month until election day for mayors, school boards, and more!!!). Keep having uncomfortable but important conversations with your family members and friends and neighbors. It’s adding up.
Without further ado, here’s this week’s Good Queer News!
LGBTQNation ran a really lovely article highlighting the voices of LGBTQ+ elders, which put the current moment in context. For folks who have come out more recently, or who are newer to social movements, or even folks who’ve been out a long time but might not be as tapped in to queer history, it’s critical to realize just how far we’ve come in the past few decades. Yes, we are experiencing an intense, hostile backlash to this growth, but even with that we are seeing continued growth in the empathy, openness, and allyship of everyday people. I loved reading this article!
Since this weekend marked National Coming Out Day, I’m going to start with a great one: A new study found that 96% of LGBTQ+ adults are out to at least one person. The context for how amazing that is? When they conducted the same study last year, it was only 82%. Going from nearly 20% of LGBTQ+ people being completely closeted and isolated to 3%? That is a win. That is unbelievable. We still have further to go with making sure those conversations are safe and supportive, but I am genuinely floored by this change. Even when the politicians would like us to go away, we are more visible than ever before.
Cultural Vibe Shift Wins
MIT has rejected Trump’s anti-trans, anti-DEI “compact” meant to give priority funding to universities that agreed to a set of terms laid out by his administration. (and Gavin Newsom told all the CA schools that if they accepted the compact, they’d lose all their state funding right away!)
The Virginia Governor’s race has been very hotly contested, and the republican candidate has been leaning hard into anti-trans messaging and tactics mirroring the 2024 Trump campaign. The biggest difference? This time, it’s not working. The Democrat, Abigail Spanberger, continues to increase her sharing of the polling. According to Erin Reed, even several republicans have begun to wonder if the republican candidate is going to talk about anything except transgender issues. (10/7 Erin in the Morning)
This summer, the Supreme Court required that school districts in Maryland give families the ability to “opt out” of LGBTQ+ inclusive curriculum in schools. According to Erin Reed, out of over 160,000 students, 43 families have opted out. The supreme court doesn’t define culture. We do. This school year, Maryland families are saying clearly that LGBTQ+ stories, BIPOC stories, and mental health stories belong in the classroom. (10/2 Bethesda Today)
Legal Wins
The Huntington Beach Library System has been blocked by the courts from attempting to implement an anti-LGBTQ+ book ban! (LGBTQNation)
Elk Grove School District has voted 7-1 against a proposal to ban transgender athletes from competing! (Sacramento Bee)
A Wyoming Library Director who was wrongfully fired for stocking and recommending LGBTQ+ books was given a $700,000 settlement! (10/8 NBCOut)
A judge has blocked Nassau County, New York from enforcing their anti-trans athletics ban for adults using state recreational facilities. A Long Island roller derby league has sued to protect their trans teammates. (10/9 NBCOut)
As many advocates said was going to be the case (though we were drowned out by the fearmongering and fundraising campaigns 🙄) Conservative Justice Samuel Alito has confirmed he does not intend to overturn Obergefell and does not think the case needs to be looked at again. (10/3 NBCOut)
After a grueling two-year fight, starting on Tuesday, the Kansas Department of Revenue (KDOR) will resume issuing accurate driver’s licenses to transgender Kansans (10/2, Erin in the Morning)
Okay, I think that’s all I’ve got for the moment! Thanks for sticking around to this point with me, folks. In case I haven’t told you lately, I’m glad you’re here. I see you. I love you. I’m not always the most on top of my comments or my messages (though I have some plans to get better about that once my travel season is over), but I want you to know I see them. I see you. Thank you for being here on this journey with me.
If there’s anything I missed, don’t forget to let me know!